Anna, age 6:
Anna: The yellow one is the captain, right?
Me: Yep.
Anna: The red ones have only bad luck?
Me: Yep.
Me: Did Jay hug you today?
Anna: Yeah, while I was dancing. (embarrassed)
Me: What did you think about that?
Anna: Not very appropriate for an 8 year old. (serious)
Anna, age 3-4 and Maya, age 1:
Mom and Me: stunned silence.Anna: 4 months after her 4th birthday, “Mommy, on my 4th birthday, when I blew out the candles, I wished for a mermaid to come and swim with my other mermaid.”
There was a strong implication that she would lose her innocence if it didn’t come true soon.Mom: “Here’s your milk Anna.”
Anna: “I wanted Hot Chocolate but Not Too Hot™!”
Mom: “You asked for milk.”
Anna: “I changed it in my mind, remember?”
Anna: “Risha is going to grow up to be a unicorn.”
Mom: “That is a great thing to aspire to.”
Anna: “No, he is really going to do it!”
Anna: “Look Dad, I’m naked!”
Me: “Why?”
Anna: “It’s delightful!”
Anna: “Mom when people are bad do the police take them to prison?”
Mom: “That is how it’s supposed to work.”
Anna: sincerely, “I hope the police don’t sneak and get you.”
Mom: “Why would the police come and get me?”
Anna: quietly, “Sometimes you make accidents.”
Anna: “Sinuplex, it helps you breathe better!”
Mom: “That was just a commercial to make money off you.”
Anna: Horrified gasp, “That’s not good!”
Anna: “Mommy, I want to go to the store”
Mom: “What do you want to buy?”
Anna: “I don’t know, I’ll just point to things when we get there.”
Anna: “I hope Daddy’s having fun sneaking.”
and
Anna: “Is daddy sneaking at yahoo?”
(apparently I started this when I explained I needed to have my photo id to avoid sneaking around Yahoo)
Mom: “We are going to a high floor in this building.”
Anna: “Will we hit our heads?”
Mom: “What do you mean?”
Anna: “You said we are going to a high floor!”
Anna: “I wish I had those kinds of blocks. there’s only one problem…I don’t HAVE those kinds of blocks! Do I?”
Anna: “Daddy it can’t be Christmas Eve! There’s no snow!”
Anna: frowning, “I don’t like how clean this place is…”
Anna: “You’re not mad it me Dad?”
Me: “No, why would I be mad?”
Anna: “Umm. No reason.”
(find out later she had written on some furniture and had already been punished)
Jay, a friend of Anna’s at school, 5 years old: “Anna, can you recognize me? I have a bandana on!”
Anna: “Hi, Jay.”
Maya: “Packpack!”
(Maya, wearing a purple onesey, hangs on tightly to Anna’s back)
Maya: “Knah Knah”
Anna: “Who’s there?
Anna whispers: “You have to say cow.”
Maya: “Cowie!”
Anna: “Daddy, can you do me a teensy weensy favor?”
Anna: “…55, 56, 57, 58… Wow, I’m a long way from 1!”
Anna: “Mommy, I wish I could be little again like Maya. I don’t like me like this.”
Anna: “I don’t like boys.”
Mom: “Why?”
Anna: “Because they are too handsome!”
Anna: “Mom, what does blue and grey make?”
Mom: “I don’t know.”
Anna: “A BIG mess.”
Anna: (singing) “This is the life…”
(while she is swimming around in the big bathtub with an innertube)
Anna: “Knock. Knock.”
Mom: “Who’s there?”
Anna: “Chicken that crossed the road.”
Mom: “Chicken that crossed the road who?”
Anna: “To get the other side!”
Mom: “What did you wish for tonight?”
Anna: “Plenty of things.”
Mom: “What kinds of things?”
Anna: “You’ll never guess.”
Me: “Anna, stop sitting on mommy’s head!”
Anna: “I can’t. I’m 3 and i do silly things.”
Anna: “Cathy, you’re too big.”
Cathy: “I’m too big? How big should I be?”
Anna cupping her hands: “This big. Then I could eat you up.”
Cathy: “But then I’ll be gone!”
Anna: “Nooo. I’d poop you out!”
Anna: “I just love a good day.”
Wife: “Anna, where is the new Highlights Magazine?”
Anna: “I don’t know.”
Mom: “You just had it, where is it?”
Anna: “It’s ok. Just let it go.”
Mom: !??!?!!?!
(the magazine was never found)
Anna: “Mommy! Mommy! You forgot something. You made a mistake. You need to buckle me in.”
Mom: “You’re right! Thank you for telling me before Daddy started driving.”
Anna: “Yeah, that is because I’m an expert.”
Anna: “Mom! Maya is going to mess up my royal bath!”
(Maya is found fully dressed playing in the water stream in the bath tub with Anna).
Anna: “Mom, I’m bored.”
Mom: “Do your work book pages.”
Anna: “That won’t cheer me up.”
Mom: “That’s a nice blouse!”
Anna: “I made it myself.”
Mom: “Anna, what did you do at school today?”
Anna: “Making new friends… Such as you!”
Mom: “Look on TV Anna, that is one of Cathy’s friends.”
Anna after looking up: “Hmmm. He’s not in my life.”
Anna: “Daddy, I love you like Saturday.”
Anna: “I’m wishing on a wishing star.”
Me: “What are you wishing for?”
Anna: “Yooooou’lllll see!”
Anna to kid at school: “Listen, there are 10 rules in this classroom and you’re not following 1 of them!”
(Teacher claims there aren’t 10 rules and she made that up)
Anna jokes: “You’re a giant cookie! HAHAHAHAHAAH!” (who knows)
Anna introducing Maya: “This is my friend Maya. She’s a scientist.”
Anna: “I love Anna’s world.”
Me: “What is the best thing in it?”
Anna: “Making new friends.”
Me: “What’s that name of that teddy bear?”
Anna: “That bear has no name.”
Me: “Why don’t you name it?”
Anna: “No! He doesn’t need a name!”
These both started with Anna being grounded from her computer:
Anna: “Dad, you said i couldn’t use my computer, but can i use this other one?”
Me: “Ha! No.”
Me: “What do you want for dinner?”
Anna: “My computer!”
Anna working on her Macbook Pro: “Ahhh!! its the rainbow dad!!! Help!!”
Me holding Anna‘s hand, walking fast, dragging her a little:
Anna: “Look! i have a daddy kite! Get it?! Get it?!”
Anna: “Dad, the TV printed!” (she meant it stopped, like when she prints something from the computer)
Anna: “Daddy, everything in my world is just perfect!”
Anna: “I amn’t.” (the other contracted version of I am not)
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